In My High Heel Shoes

Boston Weekend!

2008-10-19T10:17:00.002-05:00

Just wanted to Post a few highlights from my weekend in Boston last week! Lisa, Jenn and I went up to visit our fav Bostonian Melissa. Melissa and I are the only two who have been able to make it to every Great American Cities Tour Stop. I guess we ocnsider NYC the first one since we spent 4 years there, but the first trip was to Philadelphia, then Nick and Melissa came down to AC (its a great american city in my book!), and now we've made it to Boston! I say we should do Vegas next... just sayin.

1925-2008

2008-09-27T09:24:00.003-05:00

Haven't updated this in awhile, but had to mention the passing of one of my favorite movie stars! Paul Newman passed away, and not only was he an amazing actor - he made banging salad dressing and popcorn (among other products). He was also kinda a badass because he raced cars too! Such the renaissance man.

He was married to Joann Woodward for over 50 years, thats like being married for 5 lifetimes in Hollywood years.

Its so upsetting when an actor from the "golden era" dies, and the more that pass, the more upsetting it gets. He was literally a living legend, which doesn't come around to often. I can't think of anyone other than Elizabeth Taylor that this term can apply to (I would love to say Madonnna, but its not really fair to be called a living legend until you reach your 70s I think).

Safe to say that Cat on a Hot Tin Roof will be in the DVD player some point this weekend.

Great Wall of Siobhan

2008-09-06T09:45:00.002-05:00

Back from Vacay in VA. Also back in Mount Laurel. I had decided that if I was going to move back to home not-always-so-sweet home, my room needed a major overhaul. With the exception of The Wall. Never coming down as long as I'm living in there, bottom line. I know parts of it are 10 years old, but that makes me love it even more. And since I haven't been living at home for awhile, its funny to look at those old pictures from 8th grade. Its like a pop culture time capsule on my wall. Remember how those Germans refused to take down that wall for the longest time much to the chagrin to everyone else? A similar situation is going on right now in my house. My mom mentioned taking it down in a "few months" and I just laughed at her. Oh Lesley, so young sometimes.

Maybe if she could get David Hasselhoff to sing to me while I take down the wall I'll do it. But even then I probably wouldn't.

Mad Men vs. The Office

2008-08-06T08:32:00.002-05:00

Our e-mail is down at work right now, without e-mail we're like Mad Men! Except that we have computers, the internet, cell phones with the internet, and women are allowed to be more than secretaries here.

Oh our e-mail came back as I was writing this... back to The Office...

Help!

2008-03-13T19:26:00.000-05:00

Just watching the Beatles Anthology with Jess, and while we were watching one of their old concerts from the 60s, I made a comment about how I wish I had a time machine. And Jess made the good point that our kids wouldn’t want to come to our current time period. That made me so annoyed, not at Jessica of course because she was telling the truth, but I realized there really isn’t one artist/band of our generation. There are alot that have come from the generation before us that are still popular today, like I don’t consider Madonna from my time period since I wasn’t even born when she came out with her first single, so I don’t think that can count. I’m not saying there are some great bands out now, but there is nothing close that comes to The Beatles, Who, Stones, etc. They are such monsters of the music industry, that nothing else really is a fair comparison. It could be due to the fact that these bands were the forefathers of the rock movement (well I guess they wouldn’t be, you could argue that the blues masters of the 40s and 50s were the forefathers since they were the ones that were being covered by the bands above.)

I think our generation needs to get a move on.

Happy Easter!

2008-01-15T20:46:00.000-05:00

It must be Easter because my digital camera resurrected from the dead! Praise Kodak!

RIP Digital Camera July 2007- Jan 2008

2008-01-14T15:06:00.001-05:00

Over the weekend my Digital Camera (which was a birthday gift from Dec 2006, and I didn't receive it until summer 2007) committed suicide. It leapt from my hands and into a cup of beer, drowning itself. Oh Digital Camera, why did you have to die? Did you feel like you couldn't come to me with your problems? I hope this is a cautionary tale for all you digital camera owners, beware of beer-filled cups! Something about them drives cameras to suicide!

Peace Out '07

2007-12-29T20:11:00.000-05:00

This year I...
Turned 24.
Ended my job with Citi Capital.
Was employed at a real job - Paetec.
Moved to Atlantic City.
Met Josh Nolan.
Saw The Police, Rufus Wainwright, Hanson, Gwen Stefani and Akon, and The Fratellis in concert.
Starred in I Hate Hamlet, which was directed by Jessica.
shopped.
went to the movies.
bought movies.
Visited Manhattan College friends.
went to the beach.
Saw Avenue Q.
Read the last Harry Potter.
had a new member born into the family.
Started a new blog with Jessica about our AC tales: thedunesac.blogspot.com

and much more that isn't suitable to talk about in public ;-)

Foxboro Hot Tubs

2007-12-12T23:13:00.000-05:00

So the internet is quite abuzz with the new side project from Green Day. Side projects can either be amazing and alot of fun, or they can be... The Life and Times of Chris Gaines... and I think thats enought said.

I went on an internet exploration to find the 6 track EP they just put out. Funnily enough, the only day it has been available to download so far was my birthday. But I was able to download the EP from the following website for all who are interested:

http://strikegently.blogspot.com/2007/12/introducing-foxboro-hot-tubs.html

Friday (Just Got Paid)

2007-10-19T14:54:00.000-05:00

It is currently 3:56 and I have at most, an hour and a half left at work. I'm hoping I'll get out early, in that respect going to work reminds me of those 3 hour night classes I would take at Manhattan College to free up my schedule during the week. Right before every class I would mull over the idea of not going, but if I sucked it up and went, once I was there, I just look at the clock and pray my teacher would take pity and let us out before the bus left. I have a bad habit of not having the motivation to finish something, which is weird because I always feel so accomplished and good about myself when I do finish a project or task. I think when I realize something is about to be done, I get restless and impatient all of a sudden and just want it done that second. If I'm not mistaken, that is a sign of ADD, which I don't think I...

Omg did you see last night's episode of The Office?? It was amazing. It had all the elements of a perfect Office episode. It was hilarious, there were heart-warming moments, and you learned a little about some of the Office employee's personal lives. I love when there are heart-warming moments in their episodes, I think its because they show how much an office can become a dysfuncional family. It happens, even if you don't like some of the people you work with, just how you can't choose your family, you can't choose who you work with.

I'm working Bra-tha...

2007-10-10T14:01:00.000-05:00

Maria reminded me that I have a blog today, so I'm doing a post when I really should be working...

A whole new world of tv has opened up for me. We finally got DVR!! I've wanted DVR for years and I'm so thrilled to have it, its a tad sad. But now I can record as many episodes of Dog the Bounty Hunter as I please! I'm slowly trying to convert the apartment into Dog fans, and I definitely have Lexi on my side, and now I'm working on Jessica. Dog just has the biggest heart and is so endearing, you can't not love the Dog. I want to be an outlaw in Hawaii just so I can get on the show. I'll start selling "ice" on the streets... but I won't be doing it because I don't want to get a gross meth face... *coughcoughfergiecoughcough*

Poison!

2007-08-28T21:34:00.000-05:00

Holy Crap, I just saw you can add video onto blogspot! This changes so much! I want to start to do "talky blogs" a la Ross "The Intern" Matthews from Jay Leno and Celebrity Fit Club fame. Aww I just realized how much I miss CFC. Luckily Surreal Life is starting up soon! VH1 has all my guilty pleasures, my main one is Rock of Love, but I'm anticipating Flavor of Love as well! But back to Rock of Love... Lacey haunts me in my dreams, she is so crazy. Not in an entertaining way either, more like an uncomfortable way. She is totally still on that show to cause trouble. I'm thinking that the final two will definately be Jess, and I'm not sure who else. Heather "the Whore" might go far, but I think she'll get kicked off when there are only 3 people left.

I think I'm blogging again because my dad cancelled HBO tonight. At least he did it after Weeds, but I would have liked him to at least wait a couple days until I'm gone... FOREVER. In typical Mike and Lesley fashion, they're going away the night before I leave, so the only O'Brien family member that will see me off is Bailey. Very typical.

Another fun thing in my life is my NEW CAR:

Summer Summer Summertime

2007-07-15T10:17:00.001-05:00

So its almost halfway through the summer and at the moment I am starting my version of summer vacation. My parents are gone for two weeks, so I can just sit and relax, and not have to worry about being yelled at constantly for leaving shoes in the dining room and other inane tasks. It may not seem like much, but to me... its heaven.

MyYearbook, and the No Yearbook Party

2007-03-08T22:09:00.000-05:00

new website that I am enjoying. kinda like if myspace and facebook had a baby and I raised it: http://www.myyearbook.com

For the second time in a month I got to visit my friends from Manhattan College. Last time was for Maria's 23rd Birthday, this time was for the Yearbook Party. In true Man Coll fashion, there were no yearbooks because something was screwed up, but at least they didn't screw up the beer order! It was cool/weird/sentimental to see my old classmates, personally, it didn't feel like a lot of time had passed, but really, it hasn't even been a year yet.

my pockets came in handy!

59th Post Spectacular!

2007-03-08T22:00:00.001-05:00

I made it! The 59th Post!!!!!

I was going to do a clip show, but then I remembered that this is a blog and not a tv show.

But I do have a recent "Untitled" Mix that has gone over very well in Matt Shell's car on monday nights. I know its a limited demographic, but I take what I can get.

Sublime - Smoke Two Joints
Dropkick Murphys - I'm Shipping Up to Boston
Janis Joplin - Rollerskate Song
Bob Dylan - Wigwam
Kanye West - Gone
The Who - Sparks
The Flamingos - I Only Have Eyes for You
DMB - Louisiana Bayou
Ginger Coyle - Georgia (My Baby He's Back Home)
Fog Hat - Slow Ride
The Beatles - Beacause (from LOVE)
Gorillaz - Dirty Harry
Nico - These Days
Led Zeppelin - Thats the Way
The Shins - Sleeping Lessons
Aqualung - The Lake
Simon and Garfunkel - 59th St. Bridge Song (feelin' groovy)
White Stripes - Black Math
Unkle Bob - Swans
The Kinks - Victoria

Boy the title of this post is kinda dec ... ("i before e except after c...") deceiving because I really wouldn't conside this entry "spectacular!" by any means. The Playlist is spectacular though! So I guess that makes up for it.

Is She Lucky She's a Star?

2007-03-01T10:52:00.000-05:00

Today various blogs posted pictures of Britney leaving Promises Rehab Facility (I recall Ben Affleck went there for his drinking a few years ago) and I breathed a sigh of relief. She looked happy (no "Angry" Britney who chases paps around with an umbrella) and wasn't dressed like total crap. Maybe the alledged cocaine, ex, and booze impaired her fashion judgement. Oooh and she was wearing her wedding ring. I never thought I would say this but, I hope she gets back with K. Fed. Omg I can't believe I just typed that... but its true. What is going on in the pop world today!? I just creeped myself out, I'm going to go watch the View.

This Makes Me Miss College....

2007-02-09T22:13:00.000-05:00

Someone else had this up and I found it funny:

THE 1 HIT WONDERYou will never hear this guy/girl ever say anything, whether it be to other students or the professor. Then one day, after looking extremely intense or constipated for an hour straight, they will say something so gloriously insightful that it will bring tears to the eyes of everyone who bears witness to it.Then they will never speak again.

TO - MUCH - STUFF - GIRLShe's got a huge backpack with every book for all her classes in it. A change of clothes, an umbrella and groceries. She is always late yet will choose the seat in the front middle next to the projector maximizing the disruption to the class.

THE KID THAT FUCKING NO-ONE LIKESThis kid is a douche bag! And for arguments sake let’s call him “DANNY” You desperately want to punch him in his ear, but he’s disabled. And because he disabled he makes sure to piss EVERYONE OFF with extra annoyance on the side. This kid will sometime attempt to befriend you then manage to say or do something so unspeakably rude or offer some sort of backwards compliment. Parties disassemble whenever this Ass hat manages to find his way to one. Everyone avoids him but secretly watches him to see if he will lose a crutch while walking or roll down the stairs just to get in a good chuckle.

THE Fuckin' Noo Yawker aka EMPIRE STATE COCKA disproportionately large number of Fuckin' Noo Yawkers are criminal justice, law, public administration, political science and urban planning majors. Actually from Long Island, the Fuckin' Noo Yawker has the uncanny talent of injecting the fact that they're from the NYC area into just about every conversation. They complain about just about every aspect of their college town, saying that it's inferior in some way to NYC. "You can't get a good bagel at 3:00 on a Sunday morning!" "The pizza here sucks!" They'll even take positive traits of their new surroundings and turn that into a negative - "The subway here in Washington is too clean! It's not a real fuckin' subway like in Noo Yawk, with litter and bums and rats and panhandlers and the smell of piss and shit. That's real, not this sanitized Metro rail shit where they won't even let you eat a fucking pastrami on rye!"

THE SUBURBAN RAPPERThe Suburban Rapper can be found in any common area, listening to his own music on his IPOD at an unreasonable volume. Generally (but not always) white, he awkwardly uses the words Dog, Crib, Homie, Phat, G, or Ill. If he spots you, he'll ask you to "peep this new track yo," or attempt to sell you tickets to his half-assed concert. His music is generally unbearable, and if you're lucky, you can get away with only hearing a few verses. He always seems surprised that his poser antics never land him a girl, or a record deal.

ACTIVIST ANNIESomewhat related to the man-hating feminist but has plenty more to piss her off than just men. Needs to get involved in every civil rights or ultra liberal campaign that has ever been mentioned on campus. Tries to make a cause out of every problem anybody has with authority, no matter how absurd or completely unfounded the complaint.

YOU’RE A LITTLE TOO OLD TO BE HERE GUYUsually in the 28-32 year range, this species refuses to let go of the joys of college. Can be found on campus seven days a week, and is always present at EVERY SINGLE FRAT PARTY. Will give you some lame, shady excuse why he’s still in college, and will then befriend you so he can abuse the T1 connection in your dorm room to download porn. Most often has no friends his own age, is unemployed and still lives with his parents. Because he is older than everyone else, he will constantly criticize everyone for acting like children, but will then throw a tantrum when you won’t let him play a game of HALO. He loves crappy beer, joints and the cheapest cigarettes available. You can recognize him by his weird and outdated taste in clothing and his fondness for 80’s rock music. Usually very loud, obnoxious and opinionated in the classroom, with traits similar to that of THE EXAM BEGGER and THE INTELLECTUAL SUPERHERO.

THE EXAM BEGGERThis person cannot take a test without first begging for as much review or information as possible. They cannot prepare for a test without first knowing seemingly unimportant details like "How many questions are on this test?" They will beg for extra review sessions, extra credit, and to know the exact breakdown of how the test is scored. They will waste the whole class when a test is announced if the professor doesn't shut them up. They will also spend the entire first session of a class, when the syllabus is presented trying to make homework a much higher percentage of the total grade.

BIBLE SLUTGenerally starts out being the CONVERTER, straight-laced and conservative; they go to church every week and brag about that fact often. This person even has the ability to recite any and every bible verse from memory. Then THE LUCKY BASTARD or JOHNNY THREE LEGS introduces them to the marvels of SEX,and it's all down hill from there, as they descend into the foul pits of whoredom. They of course will still go to Church every week in order to keep up a facade of piety, singing the glories of baby Jesus.

THE BABYFACEThis kid graduated high school early, but doesn't really make a big deal about it. Because of this, his social skills are somewhat undeveloped, and he is quick to attach himself to social groups in order to gain acceptance. Said social groups are quick to make him the subject of their corruption projects, and take great pleasure in getting him drunk/laid/stoned for the first time.

THE AMICABLE ATHLETESort of the polar opposite of the Hillbilly Gangster, the Amicable Athlete is usually about 6 foot three, weighing in at 225 pounds, and looks like Sam Jackson on steroids. Attending college on a sports scholarship, the Amicable Athlete probably works a cushy job at a car dealership, gets more tail than you can possibly imagine, is more or less constantly high on primo weed all of the time, and is smart enough to know that he's in for an easy ride and to enjoy it and throws great parties! While he might never turn pro, there's a good chance he'll get a good gig on the local AM sports radio station

THE STAREDOWN-ERIf this kid is corrected by another student on anything, no matter how wrong they were, and how right the corrector was, his wrath shall be incurred in the most passive-aggressive manner possible: Silently glowering at their new 'nemesis'. No matter if the incident occurred once, months ago, any time you look in this kid's general direction, he will still be fucking staring at you with the hatred of a thousand warlords. Will probably lead the victim of his piercing gaze to do a number of 'Is he still fucking staring at me?' checks.

THE WHITE RASTAFARIANAll of his tie-dyed clothes are made from, like, pure natural hemp, man! He most likely sports an impressive set of dreadlocks and can be easily spotted as he skateboards to his next class. The White Rasta can also be found playing an odd game called 'hackey sack' along with others of his kind in any park-like area, or any place that has a couple of trees nearby, and seem to have an affinity for border collies and other shaggier members of the species canine. They also seem to possess an almost MacGuyver-like ability to create a bong from a combination of nearly any common household objects within a matter of moments

.THE NEWLY-RIPE FRUITThis guy's gay! You see, he's only just found out and now he's got to make up for lost time. He may have had a healthy interest in sports, or board games - but no more. He tries, for the sake of decorum, to occasionally talk about things that do not directly involve his gayness, but he is unequal to the struggle and five or six minutes down the line, the increasingly one-sided conversation has shifted to his multiple fuck buddies, or one of his alarmingly variegated fetishes. You see, just liking cocks isn't enough - that's not gay enough for the Newly-Ripe Fruit to truly express himself. He must round his sexuality out with public discussion of whips or chains or piss drinking, but more often than not he decides he is a furry as well, and won't let it escape anyone's notice. Possibly does more to set back the cause of tolerance than Fred Phelps ever did.

THE CAVE DWELLERHis blinds are never open. His light's never on. He lives by the light of his computer. Whenever he goes out, which is very, very rare, he squints and looks frightened, often power walking to class. He uses the internet for his lectures, and never sleeps when you do, so you can't hang out with your friends/girlfriend at your place. He's not nice, but he's not mean. He's clean, but his room's a mess. There's Mountain Dew cans everywhere. He gets average grades, and he's usually a science major, though sometimes a Lit or English major.

MUSCLES MCFLAUNTYThis individual (almost always a guy) has been lifting weights since age 4, and never lets you forget about it. He goes to the gym twice a day, wears nothing more covering than a wife beater, and constantly twitches his pecs just to get you to look at his chest. McFlaunty may or may not be otherwise annoying, but it is a known fact that he eats creatine for breakfast, lunch and dinner to increase muscle mass even further; this will result in four different cancers before he is 30. Occasionally, Muscles McFlaunty will have a lisp, in which case, laugh at him.

MRS. DEGREEMisses degree has no real purpose in college except finding "Mr. Degree" majoring in some lucrative field such as computer programming,premed, law, or engineering. Often packed with great looks, a killer body and half a brain Mrs. Degree has no problem being a mere shadow of their wealthy husband and is always the first to brag and attempt to start "intelligent conversation" on the career of Mr. Degree. Always on the prowl, you may find Mrs. Degree befriending such characters as the Study Nazi, FUCKING DISGUSTING C.S. MAJOR, and the CEO Junior.

SOCIAL DISORDER GUYAvoided by everyone, this person possess a crippling social tic that goes completely unnoticed to him. If you're unlucky enough to be identified by social disorder guy in public, you will be followed regardless of how much of a hurry you pretend to be in. You will be forced, due to social etiquette, to engage in a meaningless and awkward conversation that will be filled with characterizations of your self image. Social Disorder Guy is completely comfortable stopping on his way to work for fifteen minutes or half an hour to fill you in on one of two things: either his roommate is moving out again or he has a new job. You have no classes with him, and you never see him except for random times during the day around your campus, yet he considers you one of his best friends. You probably are.

THE ANSWER MACHINEThis person gets it! They understand the material. They can answer the hard questions that require logical induction and they can form arguments using the material.Unfortunately, everyone else in the class is either the Quiet, Smart Slacker or The Frat Mattress or I'm Too Important to Be Here. The professor lectures and asks a question and no one will answer. Grated by the awkward silence, The Answer Machine finally answers.The floodgates open. From the rest of the semester onwards, the class is a dialogs between The Answer Machine and the professor interspersed with infrequent, sometimes mind-numbing comments from The Frat Mattress when she's called on and the slacker when they care. But for the most part, it's The Answer Machine. Even when they don't answer, the professor will call on them regardless of whether or not their hand is raised.

THE MEGAPHONEThis guy seems pretty intelligent and contributes with a vast amount of knowledge. Unfortunately he has got no grasp of volume at all. Will scream across the room with a content smile on his face while embarrassing the people around him. When conversing with The Megaphone you can't decide if he is constantly pulling your leg or just doesn't realize what the hell he is telling you. Does never know when to shut up but magically manages to never piss anyone seriously off.

THE GEEK PROVIDERThe provider tends to be everyone's best friend when they need something from him. Of his various requests, he spends the majority of his time lofting and unlofting bunks, or fixing people's computers. When he is not doing this, the provider is somehow nowhere to be found. For extra fun, combine THE PROVIDER with the FOREIGN SILENT CURVE DESTROYERMR.

ROTC CADETOften seen traversing campus in fatigues, yet his pack is devoid of water, map, GPS, or other survival gear. Instead, he packs the same Biology 101, Spanish II, and English Rhetoric texts that you do. Known to major in Criminology or Criminal Justice, and may show up to 8 a.m. class in PT gear, not having had time to make it home for a shower and shave after his morning run. Placed by God on Earth to counter the ramblings of Passionate Politico with physical threats (if PP is a male) or ramblings of his own stripping PP of her human/constitutional rights (if PP is a female). Very loyal to his friends and beliefs, Mr. ROTC Cadet is generally a good guy to have as a friend, or at least an amiable acquaintance.

MR. I WORK FULL TIMEThis guy uses his job as an excuse not to show up and help with group projects. He will claim that he must work all the time and therefore cannot show up for any of the group meetings. Impossible to get hold of outside of class. Generally a 50/50 shot of doing the work.MUSIC MAJOROne of the more rare species outside of Music Classes, Practice Rooms, and University Symphony Concerts. The MM spends 50% of their time practicing, 25% studying hard/semi-useless classes which require an A to get accepted to their low-paying major, 25% at band practices, and 25% with their music Fraternity/Sorority...is that 125%? Doesn't matter; MMs party so much that the high alcohol content in their bloodstream causes them to black out and loose that 25%. Tends to only date other music majors because "Only another MM can understand why they have to practice 3-4 hours a day". Depending on the instrument, music majors are laid back, but complain that they are working SOOO hard to eventually get a salary of <$35K a year but that "I love music SOOO much it doesn't matter". Usually makes fun of the Drma Nerd for not being "Real Musicians" and has enough Classical CD's to fill up Amazon.com.

FACEBOOK ADDICTThe Facebook Addict often makes references to who changed/added what, and who "its complicated" with who. Most of their sentences begin with "omg did u see _______ on his/her wall?" and end with "Tag it!" They check facebook every chance they get, only to get pissed when they dont have a new wall post from when they last checked it 18 seconds ago. They are amazed by those who mini-feed say they have "no recent activity" and how they have such self control.

The FACEBOOK ADDICT often joins many groups and is only moments away from becoming the FACEBOOK ZOMBIE.THE STUDIO ART MAJOR:The S.A.M. totes around a humongous portfolios (often containing works of art only other S.A.M.'s can appreciate) manages to whack near passersby's and destroy other objects in their path. The studio major whine's about spending all their money on ridiculously expensive studio supplies, yet they have enough for a regular smoke...you know, for the stress. Unfortunately, studio courses are inhumanely time-consuming, so the S.A.M. are almost always held up in the studio labs, yet the degree is absolutely worthless, thus resulting in a downward mental spiraling of the said major students. You could spot them easily by their odd sense of "fashion", consisting of articles such as striped socks, ripped jeans and unsightly hairstyles. The best way to test if an individual is a studio arts major is to ask him/her to help you count, as most can't do math to save their lives.

INTELLECTUAL SUPERHEROIntellectual Superhero is neither an intellectual nor a superhero, but don’t tell him that! The Intellectual Superhero is easily identified by his complete inability to allow a class period to pass by without asking at least 654 questions designed to show how "witty" and "clever" he is. He will attempt to prove the professor wrong in every class with his inane bullshit, regardless of the fact that the professor has a doctorate in the field. If it’s a science course, the Intellectual Superhero will attempt to solve every problem using an alternate method, which is always incorrect. But don’t worry; he’ll still manage to waste 20 minutes of your life with his insane method of solving the problem. At least you’ll get to laugh at him when the professor proves him wrong

.THE FACE BOOK ZOMBIEThis person comes to class every single time, yet spends 100% of class time on their laptop. They believe that if one comes to class, one will somehow absorb the material telepathically from the professor. They usually are on Face book, Forums (Many are Goons) Some sort of RPG, Solitaire, you name it. The important thing, though, is that they are not paying attention to class at all, Ever. They tend to hover in the back, and have ultra quick minimizing reflexes if a lone TA should wander back there.

THE ETHNIC TREASUREComes from a multi-ethnic back ground, and will constantly bring this up. They will write articles in the school paper about how delightfully confused they are about not knowing which ethnic stereotypes to conform to.

THE "GARY"The name is very personal and is why I choose to use it, it became a code word for these type of guys. Not exclusive to university. Usually an unattractive guy who thinks he is a stud and acts like he is hung like a porn star. Thinks he can charm and seduce any woman by lecherously rubbing her back and give back massages while trying to undo her bra. Always touching up girls even if they give the message they are not interested, even in front of their boyfriend. But thats cool, he has a black belt in Karate so will be ready to fight off any pissed boyfriends. Carries a pair of handcuffs with him and loves to put girls through bondage in the pub even if they don't want it.

THEY LIVE AT THE COFFEE SHOPIt might be an on-campus coffee shop or one right near campus, but either way they're there. Always. The group can get quite large, but there's a core of about four people. Usually this core consists of: a fat, annoying girl; a gay guy; a theater major (male or female); and an older guy, either a grad student/limpet or a townie. This core group will invariably occupy the coffee shop's only couch; if there are more than one, they will occupy the best couch. No matter where you are in the coffee shop, you will hear them laughing, shouting, calling one another hot, singing along with the song playing on the stereo ("omigod i luv this song!!"), and erupting into a chorus of "BYEEEE's" whenever one of the group finally decides to leave

.45 YEAR OLD COLLEGE STUDENT WITH 2 KIDSThe 45 Year Old College Student with Two Kids is one of the more interesting persona's found in the college classroom. This subject has returned to school in an attempt to better her life, which is a great endeavor. However, there are a few things about this person that will make you want to punch her in the face by the end of the semester. The 45-year-old college student with two kids must write down every word the professor says. This will cause the class to be peppered with calls of "can you repeat that" approximately every 0.23 seconds. Second, she must ask the most obvious questions, preferably ones the professor has already answered.

THE FLEETING LOVEBIRDSComprised mainly of Freshman, these two are fresh out of high school, and are gonna be in love forever. They take all the same classes together, they've got their first apartment together, and they're inseparable. Most of the time, one of the two had the chance to a scholarship at a better school, but turned it down in the name of love. They'll sit together in class, are always the first to volunteer for group work together, and will no doubt be broken up by the end of their first year.

THE NIGHT OWLStaying up long after you've gone to bed, a Night Owl roommate may periodically awaken you with a laughing fit after reading a Chuck Norris joke on some crappy forum or heating water in the microwave for a 3 AM cup of ramen. May be seen complaining about the lack of places open in town at 1 in the morning on Tuesday night. The Night Owl is also likely to skip morning classes

.THE GUY WITH INHUMAN HALO SKILLSThis guy doesn't have "mad skills"; Instead, there is no word in the English language that properly describes how good this fucker is with a plasma rifle or pistol. He looks rather ordinary, with no unusual physical features, nor obvious personality quirks. But give him an Xbox, and a copy of Halo, and prepare to have many recurring nightmares of what you're about to see. You could swear that the The Guy with inhuman Halo skills has found a way to wire an Xbox to his brain, because there is no other explanation to how impossibly good he is. He quite literally can chuck a grenade at a difficult-to-reach weapon, and the explosion will launch the said weapon straight at him, as if he was pulling it telekineticaly. He knows the location of every item on every map, and knows exactly when that item is gonna respawn.

STUPID UGLY FAT GIRLStupid Ugly Fat Girl feels the need to enter into every single class discussion, completely disregarding the fact that she has nothing of substance to add to the conversation. Stupid Ugly Fat Girl cannot construct a sentence without using the words "like" and "um" at least 12 times for every 2 other words. She always wears clothes that are too tight, and seems partial to gaudy rhinestone shirts with incredibly original phrases such as "Princess" strewn across the front of her sagging cow tits. The only way to actually learn something in a class with the Stupid Ugly Fat Girl is to distract her attention with a shiny object

.THE ONE UPPERThis student will make it a point to one-up anything that comes out of anyones mouth. You study for a test for 6 hours? He studied for 10. You drank 12 beers? He drank 20. You've broken your arm twice? He's broken his 3 times. The interesting thing to note about the One-Upper is the fact that everything he says is a lie, but he has convinced himself its true

.SMALL TOWN GODDESSHails from some microscopic town where she maybe had 5 or 6 classmates in her graduating class, the Small Town Goddess is what is known as HOT. SMOKING HOT, in fact. Like, all-natural, blonde haired and blue-eyed 1973-ish Playboy bunny-like hotness. However, for some reason unknown to science, she somehow did not develop what is commonly known as 'Hot Chick Syndrome' and is, instead, incredibly sweet, good natured and friendly to a fault. This, naturally, causes most members of the opposite sex to be baffled by this seemingly incongruous behavior. Many a man have approached her, yet few can stand to be around her for very long. Why, you ask? The fault lies not with her, oh dear reader! Nay, the fault comes from realizing that she is honestly squeaky clean and you, by comparison, are like some filthy hobo in your soul.

JOHNNY FRAT BOY - or - SALLY SORORITY CHICKWhile there’s certainly nothing wrong with being in a Greek organization, some people take their involvement in these groups a little too seriously. These are the people who can’t go 2 consecutive days without wearing their shirts from some drinking party they went to last weekend. Johnny Frat Boy likes to brag about how many beers he slammed down on Tuesday night, while Sally Sorority Chick acts as though she is too immaculate to be tarnished by your presence. In either case you shouldn’t worry about these two personality types too much because they only associate with each other. This brings me to another point: when you see these people outside of class, it is perfectly acceptable to run them over with your motor vehicle of choice.

STUDY NAZIStudy Nazi is in school for one reason: to get good grades. Unfortunately for Study Nazi, he’s not that bright and he struggles with his classes. That doesn’t stop him from letting everyone know how long he studied for that 5 question quiz though. Study Nazi, much like the Intellectual Superhero, will ask questions constantly during class. However, the Intellectual Superhero has some grasp of the material. Study Nazi, while he can quote his books and his notes verbatim, has no idea what any of it means. Under no circumstances should you approach Study Nazi outside of class. Doing so will only remind him that he’s losing valuable time that he could be using in the library and you might get hurt in his frenzied dash to get there as quickly as possible.

THE KARAOKE SUPERSTAR:Possessing the incredible ability of knowing the lyrics to every song ever written, but unfortunately lacking the talent to flaunt it properly, the Karaoke Superstar molds every moment of their life into that of an American Idol reject. Whether it be wailing along to their favorite Nickelback song at the bar, or belting out Phil Collins in the dorm shower at 8 in the morning, the Karaoke Superstar fails to hit the right notes every time. Those in earshot will reel in horror at the audio assault, exclaiming "Oh my God, a cat fell into the blender!" or "It sounds like someone is scraping a cheese grater across 200 feet of blackboard!" The Karaoke Superstar falls under the category of "completely ignorant," believing their vocal stylings to be those of a professional. Frequently an actual Music major, mentioning their shortcomings will result in a major blow to their ego.

THE LUCKY BASTARDAn amorphous presence, he is in your class just to make you feel crappy. He doesn't try, isn't smart, and may even be a mean SOB to people, yet gets lucky breaks in grades/finding a job/getting a girl. For instance he bombs a test but the professor loses it and acknowledges he took the test and gets the class average, or finds an emotionally unstable girl who clings to him and does anything he wants regardless of how he treats her. He also will get a job because of a crappy reason like him and the recruiter like the same baseball player.

THE BALANCED GUYThey're a fairly sociable bunch with lots of common sense, and they have fairly diversified skills. These guys seldom try to draw attention to themselves but also have a healthy amount of self-esteem (Balanced Guys generally don't attack/insult people in any way unless they feel it's warranted). They're willing to learn a little about everything and can be found in places such as the gym lifting weights, or even in a kitchen working on their cooking skills... or....sometimes in their room masturbating to a wide variety of downloaded porn clips. Who knows what Balanced Guy will do next. They aren't spendthrifts, but they aren't penny pinchers, either. They play both sports and video games. When it comes to discussions of any sort, balanced guy keeps an open mind and generally takes a politically "moderate" stance.

SILENT FOREIGN CURVE DESTROYERSilent Foreign Curve Destroyer has nothing better to do than study. While the average of the rest of the class is a respectable 45%, Silent Foreign Curve Destroyer has approximately a 1351% in the course, thereby totally destroying any chance you had of passing the class. Silent Foreign Curve Destroyer can be identified by the fact that he will be in the library before you get there and stay far after you've left. He will almost certainly wear the same clothing throughout the entire course, and, while he may be human, it's more likely that he's some kind of magic robot.

THE CELLPHONE TERRORISTThe Cellphone Terrorist has the capability to disrupt classes without even being present. They will leave their belongings in class as they go for a bathroom break when, suddenly, the sound of "My Humps" fills the room. Yes, that's The Cellphone Terrorists new ring tone for this week and it isn't going to stop until they return. Those unfortunate enough to be sitting beside The Cellphone Terrorist will hang their head in shame as piercing gazes are shot directly their way. Upon return, The Cellphone Terrorist will usually check their missed calls and proceed to call said person back by means of a covert coat-over-the-head technique that they have perfected.

FUCKING DISGUSTING C.S. MAJORFucking Disgusting Computer Science Major is the reason that you don’t want to go to class. He bathes roughly once every leap year and wears the same "totally awesome" Japanese video game (the import version was so much better) shirt for half a semester at a time. No matter how far away you get from him, the stench seems to travel across the room and assault your nostrils. Fucking Disgusting Computer Science Major has no time for the English language, and he will often ask questions that make little to no sense and lack any sort of "grammatical structure." He’s the only character that can actually give Silent Foreign Curve Destroyer a run for his money on the intellectual scale, but that’s only because he was probably born with knowledge of linear algebra and differential equations.

AGENDA ASSAILERThe Agenda Assailer has (surprise!) an agenda to push on everyone else. If you’re in, say, a science class you’ll get to hear about how the scientist who discovered some principle was a racist or misogynist and therefore his scholarly work is somehow meaningless. Even though the rest of the class is just there to learn, the Agenda Assailer will attempt to turn every class into a political debate. Here’s an example from a history class:quote:Professor: Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence.AA: How can you even SAY that?!?!?!?! He owned slaves!!!Professor: Well, yes. But he still wrote it.AA: Well then he’s a hypocrite and we should THROW OUT the Declaration of Independence!!!

THE VISIBLE MINORITYHe's the only one in your class, sometimes he makes sure that everyone knows it. Most of the time he's pretty cool tough, you just need to get to know them better. Excels at making you feel bad about random comment you make on his people.

THE ANIME FREAKAnime Freak is somewhat of a rarity outside of computer science and/or Japanese courses. However, you still might encounter one in some humanities cores. The Anime Freak will always be wearing button down shirts with a dragon or some kind of Dragonball Z character on it. Also, anything with Japanese writing on it is always cool in the eyes of Anime Freak, even if it makes absolutely no sense. Do not approach the Anime Freak outside of class, unless you want to run into a situation like this:quote:You: Hey, what’s up?AF: I think episode 185 of [insert horribly obscure anime show here] is the best because they use the Power of the Light to slay the dragon beast and save the world from total destruction!!!You: Um… I have to go.

THE ENGINEEROne who is rarely seen without a TI-83 Plus or higher model calculator, and actually knows how to, and does, use all the functions of said calculator. Often makes jokes that one outside of the Engineering spectrum will not understand, or makes really horrible ones, or both. Example: "I'm pretty sure it was a zero-force member..." "that's what she said." Takes many science/math courses that are said to "strongly relate to core Engineering" and "provide a base for higher level courses" but in reality 99% of skills in said classes are rarely used.

MAJOR ELITISTNo, he’s not in the military! Ha ha! All blatantly bad jokes aside, the Major Elitist is generally some type of science or engineering major who looks down on anyone who might even think about getting a humanities or business degree. After all, we all know that the only thing that’s important is science. All that other mamby-pansy bullshit like "History" or "English" or "the world economy" is just a bunch of feel-good rhetorical nonsense anyway. Besides, any jackass can get a liberal arts degree!

NON-CONFORMIST CONFORMISTThe Non-Conformist Conformist is an interesting species. While he tries to "fight the man," he is unable to do so without conforming to another group. The Non-Conformist Conformist can be easily identified by his Rage Against the Machine or Che Guevara t-shirt and dark green corduroy pants. During the winter he will be wearing a military field coat from Germany with a patch on the side, and he often carries a wallet on a chain. You can identify him in the classroom because he’ll feel the need to share with the class his opinions of pop culture. He’ll use a condescending tone of voice because he’s better than little sheep like you. That’s all right though because whether it be the punk, goth, or any other subculture, the Non-Conformist Conformist declares boldly, "I choose to not fit in by fitting in with a DIFFERENT group!"

FASHION MONGERFashion Monger is on the bleeding edge of fashion! While having some nice clothes is something everyone should invest in, Fashion Monger’s entire wardrobe has been purchased from stores so hip that you've never even heard of them. Apparently, it’s "hip" and "with it" to pay 500 dollars for jeans that were hand stitched by the hardworking people of Taiwan. And, as we all know, 50 dollars for a silk-screened t-shirt is a completely reasonable price, as long as it was designed by an gay Italian man. Yes, nothing says, "I have too much money and not enough common sense" quite like buying clothes with fancy designer labels that are marked up 1000%

THE SOCIABLE SLACKERThis is the guy who went out of his way to talk to you on the first day. Was really personable, seems like a normal, social person. He even suggested trading phone numbers just in case you needed help. Fast forward to the second week of class - he's not there. Same goes for all the classes until right before the midterm when you get a call. "Hey man, what's up? How's it going? Oh yeah, I missed the last class can I borrow all your notes and photocopy them? Yeah, we should go grab a beer one day." No show again until the final where he calls you up again asking for notes. And that beer? A complete fabrication.

PARADISE LOSTSmart, sheltered kid with a childhood full of religious superstition and intimacy issues. Finally gets into a relationship (aka LAID) and gets suicidal when the breakup comes a few months later. Will either hang himself in the woods or emerge as an improved species. Flip a coin.

CEO JUNIOR IIIBorn to wealth and privilege and toting an ego the size of Australia, CEO Jr. III will rarely be encountered outside of econ, business and business-related courses (like the lower level computer sciences). Much like the Fashion Monger, CJ3 is fascinated by brand names and drops them wherever possible. However, instead of dropping "real" designer names, he'll brag about the cheap shit he bought from Abercrombie last week. Success is what he's aiming for, and he'll probably get there, but only through his dad’s business connections. Like the Study Nazi, he is not particularly bright, though his particular mode of achieving good grades consists of stroking the professor's ego with appropriate questions and office hours schmoozing. Like the Sociable Slacker he is unfailingly cheerful, but his cheeriness, much like everything else about him, is completely insincere. He is astoundingly successful at getting laid for reasons which are at present unknown to science. It's probably best to avoid crossing him in social circumstances since he can wield his people skills like a weapon.

THE SKIMMERThe skimmer is easy to identify. He always sits in the back of lecture halls and is usually asleep 10 minutes into class. It is not uncommon to hear The Skimmer brag about how much studying he didn't do for that quiz coming up. The Skimmer is not usually found in higher level courses.

THE SCOUTThe Scout is always in lecture before you. Even if you show up five minutes early. The Scout will use his backpack, notebook, textbook, or anything larger than a piece of paper to cordon off the entire front row for his or her friends, who show up five minutes after the class has already started.

THE PHANTOMA completely unremarkable student in every way, THE PHANTOM shows up for classes, does the work, and... that's it. You will never see THE PHANTOM outside of class - Existing on his sheepishness and fueled by his silence, even if you live next door to THE PHANTOM you'll never hear a word of him, sometimes can be combined with Fucking Disgusting Computer Science Major for a truly wholesome experience.

FORMER MILITARY SERVICEMAN"Well, when I was in Iraq ..."And basically media misrepresentation is the cause of virtually everything bad in society these days.

VALLEY GIRLWomen who appear to be made entirely from bronzed plastic, with lips glossy enough to successfully buff the floor of a shopping mall. Don't bother remembering any of their names, as one valley girl is completely indiscernible from the next. Often seen courting Ugly Assholes.

JOHNNY THREE LEGSUsually an average-looking, somewhat lanky guy, Johnny Three Legs is extraordinary on one respect: his ten inch penis. Flaccid. How do you know? Well, he's the guy that faces towards everyone else in communal showers. In dorms with individual showers, he dries himself off in public areas, and spends just a bit more time naked than other residents, who usually whip on a towel before they even draw the curtains open. Pity his poor roommate, usually a lonely computer science major that is still a virgin, who is kept up awake at nights from the cries of Johnny Three leg's dates - "Ouch! That hurts! Ungggnmph! Oh yeah ... yes ... God ... OUCH! Let's try it another way .... yes ... oh God ... oh Jesus ... OUCH!"

MADDEN JR.This student's life revolves around sports. He can quote sports scores, character stats, and just about anything from some obscure game last week. Not only did he watch it, he studied it while his classmates were studying for that quiz he failed. He usually arrives in class approximately 10 minutes late wearing his favorite sports team hat and jacket, only to talk about sports for the entire class. Interestingly, the Madden Jr. rarely, if ever, has any athletic ability of his own, and is often obese due to a diet consisting entirely of nachos.

THE PREMEDThe pre-med has a 4.0 cumulative GPA and has junior standing even though he's a first semester sophomore. He's got a >90 average in every class this semester, but is absolutely terrified that he's going to fail them all. Can often be heard making wild assumptions about grading schemes and arguing with the TA over 0.25 point deductions on exams.

BRING ME UP, KNOCK ME DOWNHe/She is a mystery wrapped in an enigma. One day he will roll out of bed, take an exam without studying, and beat you by two full letter grades after you spent the night studying. However, the next day, you show him your 0.96 GPA only to find out that he is maintaining a 0.86 (largely from the fact that he stopped attending a class because it conflicted with his favorite television program.)He is always there to help. Whatever jam you have yourself in, he will, with ease, find a way to pull you out. However, he will do so with so much reluctance, he makes it sound as though Sisyphus (look it up) had an easy go of things. He will passive aggressively start conversations about what a drag it is being the designated driver, only days after he drove your drunk ass home.He is the infinite conundrum of friendship. He is always there for you. Unfortunately he is always there.

BABBLING IDIOTThis kid is sort of like intellectual superhero except that he's not really out to prove a point through questions, but rather through his personal experiences. He is in class to spill as many anecdotes as he can possibly think of, which, for the most part, only relate to the subject at hand tangentially. His diatribes are voiced in an overly sincere tone, which I'm sure he believes makes his stories sound more real, true to life, and hard hitting. Amazingly, his stories always tend to agree with the professor's point of view.You can tell that he thinks he's truly oozing schmooze, and that he's also in love with his own voice. It is unknown to me whether his stories are rambling and incoherent because he's trying to hear his own voice for an extended period of time, or whether he's just a babbling idiot. Evidence suggests: Babbling idiot.

THE WANNA BE COMPUTER GEEKThey can be found in groups often discussing old internet fads while downloading songs and files from P2P networks. Often annoying to the people around them. Will shout out "LOL INTERNETS" at random times and you can hear some old techno songs in the background.

THE COMMENTER Tends to occupy the center of the room for maximum visibility. Always nods along with the professor. Provides his/her own commentary, largely to herself, during lecture while jotting down notes. Most commonly uttered phrases are variations of: "Oh yeah", "Exactly", "Well, that's interesting". Example:Prof.: DNA is blueprint for life.Comm.: [Nod] [Nod] Uh-huh. Well, ain't that something

VACATION GUYThis guy didn't want to go to college in the first place, but did because he didn't want to disappoint his parents and teachers by not trying. So he picked a party school, never went to class, and treated the whole thing as a $40,000, year long, spring break away from shitty middle class suburbia. Then disappeared to a distant part of the country never to be heard from again.

THE BLONDE ASIAN TAMERFemale in a science degree who probably shouldn't be. However, due to chemicals she emits from her hair, holds sway over Silent Foreign Curve Destroyer or other male Asian students who do her beck and call. Part hive mind, part parasite. Identify by remarks like "This stuff is so hard, Haji, you're so smart" or "What did you get for number 1?". Usually a sub-species of Sally Sorority Chick

The PASSIONATE POLITICOWhatever wing of the political bird he resides within he'll be damned sure to inject his angry rhetoric and sound bites into any classroom conversation regardless of topic. Often twitchy you can spot an outburst before it happens by looking for a grimaced mouth, spasming eye, tapping foot or softly pounding fist (because he thinks no one will notice), then out comes the insanity.

MR. UNCERTAINTYMr. Uncertainty isn't really that bad a guy to have class with, as he's virtually guaranteed never to disrupt the class proceedings. Even when the teacher asks him a question directly, he'll attempt to deflect it through a magical combination of stuttering, fumbling, and vague sentences that trail off in the middle. He probably doesn't take very good notes, but he's there every day in hopes of making up for the fact. He probably has at least two majors and a third concentration that he's considering, but it's all perpetually up in the air since he doesn't really know what he wants to do. Because of this, you'll almost never see him in an advanced-level class, since he's always going back and satisfying the core requirements for a different major.

PROFESSOR CORRECTORThis student loves to volunteer class time to correct the professors' menial mistakes. Did he say 90% instead of 85%? Was he off an important date by a year? The Corrector will grab this opportunity immediately. Does the textbook back up the professor? Well that's wrong too! The whole world is filled with misinformation, and only this noble lad can spend 20 minutes setting the professor straight as everyone silently whispers "I HATE YOU." They may be a student, but they already years ahead of the class.

OBNOXIOUS CAR DRIVERPulling out of the parking deck at the speed limit while letting pedestrians cross will not fly while the OCD is around. Loud tire screeching, reeving, horn honking, and blasted music must be accompanied at even the slowest street. They will outrace and outmaneuver vans in 20 mph zones. They will rev their engine to make sure they reach the stop sign 20 feet away fast enough. Their car is modified to maximize every scrape, screech and scratch to it's highest volumes. If it's not unnecessarily loud, they are not driving.

DRAMA NERDOften found roaming (or more often loafing) in packs of 4 to 7, the drama nerd is best known for not shutting the fuck up ever and oh god i mean ever regarding new musicals, old musicals, how non-theater majors are intellectually devoid of any redeeming quality, who got cast where, etc. The drama nerd is mostly self-delusional, and if one is to ask it about it's past, the response often involves "well you know I just had the WORST time in high school i mean nobody understood me there but when I got to college I just felt like a BUTTERFLY, able to finally open my creative WINGS" and other such inane metaphors. The Drama nerd does, somehow, get laid all the goddamn time, but only by other Drama nerds, resulting in chain-reaction mega-drama-bombs that will certainly resonate throughout the school because these losers will not shut up about how Johnny Actor face "TOTALLY USED ME" at high volumes in the library during finals week. Somehow possessing both the largest and smallest reserve of self-confidence of any college student simultaneously, ladies and gentlemen: the Drama Nerd.

THE CONVERSATIONALISTYou'll find this one at the back of the class, and they tend to travel in herds. She spends all semester having conversations with the people around her, that have absolutely nothing to do with the class, usually pertaining to her boyfriend, a movie she just saw, or a party she was at/plans to attend. Completely ignorant of the people around her who are actually trying to pay attention to the lecture in a typically difficult subject. Another common trait of The Conversationalist is her apparent lack of any sort of school supplies (including pens, pencils, paper, and the freaking textbook) Sociologists have theorized that this is a subconscious ploy designed to draw more people into The Conversationalist's tangled web of distraction.

THE FACULTY MEMBERThis is a student who has become very involved and uses his major as a replacement for a social life. He may, or may not work in the department office, but you'll see him wandering around the office anyway, chatting up the actual faculty. Maybe having lunch in the waiting area. He's only annoying when you actually have a class with him and he takes on the role of a teaching assistant.

THE JACKASS OF ALL TRADESThis man is seemingly adept in all subjects, and will boast about it too. Hear him complain about how easy his last Abstract Algebra exam was, how he wrote his African paper two hours before its due and how little he prepared for his sociology presentation. His weakness is poor social skills. Ask about his girlfriend for massive emotional baggage!P

HILOSOPHER STONEREasily identifiable by his red eyes, incoherent speech, and the lingering stench of marijuana, the philosopher stoner may or may not be a member of NORML, and probably won't go to class very often. On the off chance that he actually attends a class, god forbid the professor mention anything related to drugs, because suddenly the philosopher stoner will turn into a walking, talking version of erowid.com.

I'M TO IMPORTANT TO BE HERE GIRLThis girl is much too busy to do something as menial as class. She's in a sorority, she's in the student senate and she's got a boyfriend on the lacrosse team. She treats class like it's a bother- much like a PTA meeting. During the entire class period, her blistered thumbs are hammering at the tiny keys on her super expensive new cell phone that Daddy's bought her three times because she keeps wearing it out. Whenever the professor asks her to stop her hammering, her face curls up worse than Reese Witherspoon's after eating out an asshole.

DEER IN HEADLIGHT CHICKNormally, she's quiet. She's so quiet she'll duck down when the professor looks to ask questions. The second she's called on to give a speech, her entire body tenses up. Very rarely will a word escape her mouth that's not "Uhhh" or "Like". She's known for freezing up for periods of greater than one minute during in-class presentations, much to everyone else's amusement.

THE SNIPERThis is the kid, usually a male, who sits in the back of the class and will constantly spout out smart ass remarks at the professor in an attempt to act like he really doesn't really care for the class and thinks he is super cool cause he can be so disrespectful in class. But this guy is important cause when the class starts dragging and getting boring, he can usually lighten the mood. Annoying and funny at the same time.

THE REDNECKThe redneck managed to get into the college because he went to a backwoods school composed entirely of trailers in a swamp, where 4.0 gpa's are a dime a dozen, and anyone can pass the classes practically by attending. Unfortunately, he is probably going to fail multiple classes in a semester and drop out soon. Unattractive, disgusting hygiene, has a taste for inferior websites, loves to hunt, sometimes wears camouflage to class, attends every athletic event, and likes to "Git-R-Dun" occasionally. Nothing more than a friendly nuisance on his own, he is a very dangerous animal in the company of others exactly the same.

I STUDIED ABROAD AND IT CHANGED MY LIFEThis person has spent anywhere from 3-12 months in a country that isn't too different from our own, but it's sooo much better. It's so cultured and you can drink without having the draconian American laws over your back. Most of this student's stories involve getting drunk and hooking up with a creepy older gentleman or passing out on the couch interspersed with some sightseeing. But it changed her life, like OMG i totally know how people in other countries live and I'll keep talking and talking and talking about it.

QUIET SMART SLACKERNormally found in one of the back rows but not the very back as he is trying to blend in. Doesn't say much in class, only being social when he has to or with people he knows outside of class. Won't disrupt class but if called on will answer correctly. Pays attention, but doesn't always do work, or work hard. Shows up to class 80% of the time, but does 40% of the outside work/study time. Graduates in 5-6 years with a 3.0 but only because of intelligence and test scores, not effort (as shown in number of years taken to graduate).

THE ANNOYING CLONEThis is a person you meet in the class that you share the same interests and hobbies. At first you enjoy talking and hanging out with them, but then all they do is constantly talk about the same interests and never want to talk about anything else, and every day they want to hang out after class and do something related to the point it drives you insane. In the end you end up hating both the person, and what you enjoyed.

THE CONVERTERThis guy or gal is a shining beacon of their Religion, and will attempt to bring it to light every chance they get, and attempt to get you to believe in whatever it is they believe. Anytime your classes mention faith, she is the first to preach to the entire class, and say that her deity is what everyone needs to follow

THE HERETICExact opposite of The Converter, this person hates all forms of Religion and despises God. Used to be devoted to a faith, but lost his or her faith through some event in the past, such as a major physical/psychological trauma. This person loves to quote John Milton, and argue with others who believe in God.

THE COMPUTER DUMMYCannot use a computer or any technology to save their life. This person will rely on you to help them type up reports, assignments, or use excel/power point/access for projects. Will also become dazzled if they see you playing any kind of video game or watching a DVD in your dorm, and will want to learn more about it.

THE LOVE-HATER:The guy/girl who's too cool for romance, and has to insult every couple that passes their way. Whether staring, snickering, or outright making an idiotic comment, the love-hater somehow tries to be "different" by not looking for an opportunity to pass on their genes. Needless to say, these types are usually at home practicing their five-knuckle shuffle.

THE "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH THAT" NINJA:These people are ninjas in disguise, often lurking amongst the normal people. They seem nice at first, but when they come to the part of the discussion of majors, the inevitable question of "What are you going to do with that?" comes up. Usually in a patronizing tone, they also carry shiruken... too bad that the weapons are so far up their a$$es that they can't utilize them.

THE WANNA-BE JOCK:The chubby idiot in the back of the classes, busy bragging about the amazing three pointer he pulled in a game with the boys. However, if studied in its natural habitat, the Wanna-be Jock can be seen getting the only sports exposure from a video game console. NOTE: If encountering one of these during its ritualistic video gaming, beware of celebrations. They often involve screaming and waving when they get an extra point on Madden NFL.

THE YING-YANGER:Found in most of the female population in college settings, the Ying-Yangers are those who, if approached by someone athletic, will swoon and bend to their every whim. However, if approached by someone of the least bit imperfection, the Ying-Yanger will sneer in disgust... if providing a reaction at all.

THE NON-STREET GANGSTA:Often seen wearing designer clothes, the NSG is often male. They talk street, smoke pot, and pretend that they are the toughest thing around. Often found hiding from real fights or blasting rap music from a dorm window in hopes to attract a mate.

THE THREAT:Black trench coat. Few words. Odd knowledge about weapons. And somehow, he always seems to sit next to you in class.

THE APATHETIC GENIUSThe apathetic genius is the pinnacle of wasted potential. He shows up to most of his classes, and is minorly sociable. He is involved in class discussions but will never write a single page of notes, never does any extra credit or optional assignments, and never even reads the textbook or studies. Despite this he will consistently get A's and B's in every class he takes, all while exerting no apparent effort. This person probably has the ability to cure cancer some day, but years of being unchallenged and socially shunned will lead him to drop out after his first or second year.

THE DUDE WHO KNOWS FUCKING EVERYONEEverywhere you go, this guy knows somebody he has to high five and chat with for a little bit. He probably grew up in the area, has an outgoing personality, and is involved in a wide variety of activities that breach many social circles. Generally liked, although he may be too outgoing for some people. Generally doesn't have a lot of close friends, but makes up for it in sheer volume. This is the guy to talk to if you're interested in a new hobby, want to join a club, or just want to meet new people. May do incredibly outrageous things to get even more attention.

THE R.A.The R.A. lives to fuck up your social life. Lurking behind every dark shadow; The R.A. springs to action and stomps out any signs of fun, ranging from a friendly game of Bingo to a raging smörgåsbord orgy. This guy, often hated by many feels because he is getting free housing owes it to his said college to annoy all with his passive –aggressive confrontational vendetta against all on campus students. All that is missing is a whistle, and a safety badge. Often useless, The R.A. does come in handy when the PHILOSOPHER STONER, JOHNNY FRAT BOY - or - SALLY SORORITY CHICK locks themselves out at 4am.

JUST DOING THIS FOR THE FREE HOUSING R.A.This RA just says hi and bye to residents. Decorates the bulletin board and complete the minimal number of required programs. This R.A. is cool as shit, but makes it clear they are only here for the free housing.

MAN-HATING FEMINISTUsually found in Women's Studies or English classes. They find enjoyment in discussing how the standard of beauty is too high and how the opposite sex has taken over the world. They also tend to wear clothing that shows off cleavage in order to show that they are comfortable with their bodies. They tend to be loud in class discussions and easily annoyed by male classmates. Almost every conversation turns into a discussion of how men are degrading women.

I-PLACED-INTO-HIGHER-LEVEL -CLASSES-YOU-SHOULD-THINK- I'M-THE-SHIT-CAUSE-I-DO!This individual is a Freshman, who managed to get placed into upper level courses. Because of this, he will establish a heightened feeling of self-worth, and will consider himself to be a worthy equal to the majors in said department. Will bring up the fact that they are a FRESHMAN at every opportunity, and will become confounded when the upperclassmen in the same major aren't fawning over him or trying to suck his cock out of amazement at how awesome he must be, because he's taking upper level classes, but he's merely a FRESHMAN. Will most likely be despised by all other majors of the department, but will remain oblivious to this fact and try to strike up pointless conversation, mostly focusing on how they are a FRESHMAN TAKING THE SAME CLASS AS YOU. If it is a language course, they will try to chat in that language, regardless of the fact that you won't understand what-the-fuck. Not because they're better than you, but in their pretentious righteousness, they don't realize they completely suck at it.

THE SILENT, STRAIGHT-LACED GEMThis girl is rather shy, quite studious, probably pretty conservative, and usually somewhat attractive in a sort of clean, traditional, classic way. Sometimes, her quietness or straight face may be misinterpreted as indifference or the "get away from me" look, but once you get to know her, she is actually quite nice and makes a decent friend. She doesn't drink or smoke - not because she's a "goody two-shoes", but because she genuinely has no desire to. This girl may end up a loner if she's not careful - spending countless hours locked away in her dorm room, reading, or (if she pushes herself a little) can be found actually socializing. Gets along with most people, has a decent social circle, but holds just a few close friends. May need a little push to get involved in activities. Makes a reliable friend. Is a hard worker, but can enjoy having fun too.

THE SKATERUsually listens to "emo" music and wears nothing but skate brands, sagging jeans with a belt and t-shirt (sometimes a hoodie and a beanie). The skater is rarely seen without skateboard in hand. He is not particularly bright, nor does he say much. These types when not skateboarding through campus by themselves travel in pacts.

THE WANNABEThis type pretends to know everything about a few subjects and will attempt to impress you with their extensive knowledge on said subject. Often times someone who actually knows what they are talking about will correct the wannabe, however the wannabe will argue his or her side until someone presents them with hard evidence that they were actually wrong. The wannabe will change their personality according to who they are with. No one knows what the wannabe is actually like because he/she is always changing.

THE INDIE KIDThe indie kid is the guy/girl who wear nothing but vintage cloths purchase from thrift stores and listens to music by bands that nobody has ever heard of. Indie kids stick together, always involved in some sort of "intellectual" conversation about a worldly event (past or present) that everybody is not talking about. Often times the indie kid will go out of his or her way to mention something obscure to give themselves "indie cred".

THE EDUCATION MAJORAs a freshman, the education major parties excessively, because he or she knows in subsequent years, they won't be able to have any more late nights out due to having to go to field experience at a local school. The education major finds themselves wishing they could sign up for an 8 AM class because it feels like sleeping in when he or she compares it to waking up for field or student teaching at 5:30 in the morning.

HUSBAND/BRIDE TO BEUsually a freshman who is currently engaged. You often ask yourself how long will it last?, Why will anyone mary him/her?, when will he/she know that it may have been a bit too early?(After the divorce of course :D). Often talks about how he/she will be married soon, and relates alot of the projects he/she has done to marriage. Will need a therapist in the future if it all goes wrong.

THE HIGH-SCHOOLERTypically a girl and a Freshman. Spends most of her time stereotyping hallmates, classmates, and other acquaintances based on what cliques they would have belonged to in her high school. Her favorite hobby is badmouthing these people because 'in HIGH SCHOOL' she would never have associated with them. She also enjoys critiquing and complaining about every aspect of college which is 'different' from her high school experience.

I'M RIGHT, YOU'RE WRONGThis person has a very strong opinion about EVERYTHING and will force it down the throat of EVERY PERSON that opposes them. This is made intolerable by the fact that the "i'm right you're wrong" 's opinions aren't backed up very well or are announced in a very ridiculous and obnoxious manner. This people abuse terms like "liberal, democrat, hippie, freak, tree hugger, terrorist, right-wing, extremist, etc." Very often the opinion is somewhat one sided

THE I CAN QUITTERThis person, smokes, drinks, has other bad habits and can quit whenever they want. When asked to quit they always respond I would but i don't wanna.

THE CHOIR NERDA mixture of the music major and the american idol reject, this person you can hear down the hall singing La vie Boheme off key and way out of their register. These poor souls actually believe that their major is going to be lucrative one day and let them have something to boast about at their 10 year reunion. They tend to visit their old high school choir and still wear their old letterman that has all the patches from solo and ensemble contests since freshman year. They generally rank themselves as more accepting than the drama nerds but in the end will only talk to each other because "they understand each other."

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU? KIDThis kid will confuse the HELL out of you from day to day. One day, she's THE ANSWERING MACHINE, next the QUIET SMART SLACKER, then BRING ME UP, KNOCK ME DOWN. She used to be a MUSIC MAJOR, but she randomly changes to a hard science major. She will always be to class early (THE SCOUT) unless she was THE NIGHT OWL the night before. Can be THE SILENT STRAIGHT LACED GEM, and then starts flaring up with her MAN HATING FEMINISM. Wears totally amazing clothes, or something so lame you wouldn't wear to sleep in. Hates the conformity of society with a passion (NON-CONFORMIST CONFORMIST), but can be seen with many different groups, more often with the ANIME FREAKS. You often can't recognize them at parties or class because of complete transformations. Good luck trying to contact her, because her spontaneity with throw you for a loop and you will never be able to find her.

JUST HAPPY TO BE AWAY FROM HER DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY FOR A SEMESTER GIRLJhtbafhdffasg is usually the happiest person on campus. she doesn't take parties for granted. if there are five parties going on simultaneously, she's somehow having the time of her life at all five. she won't disrupt class with any senseless questions, although it may take some time to get used to her everlasting smile. she makes an awesome friend, always optimistic until winter break rolls around and you have to drag her out of her dorm kicking and screaming.

There really is only One...

2007-02-09T16:35:00.000-05:00

Bored, so posting some pictures of Marilyn that I google imaged. Google Images is the best (of course Google Maps is the best also, (true dat, double true!)). Speaking of Marilyn, as much as I loved Anna Nicole, I don't think she is the new Marilyn. Lets go with the new Jayne Mansfield. Jayne Mansfield also died young and left behind young children as well. Her daughter Mariska Hargitay became famous in her own right for Law and Order: SVU. Maybe Dannilyn Hope will go into showbiz. I can totally see her being a Golden Globes Girl 18 years from now. I'm actually hoping that this Larry Birkhead guy is the baby's daddy, something tells me that her lawyer would go all Woody Allen on this kid when she grew up.

1967 - 2007

2007-02-08T19:31:00.000-05:00

Goldenfiddle has the Anna Nicole Guess? Ads: http://goldenfiddle.com/image/tid/219

What Would Tyler Durden Do on what Anna would have wanted at her funeral: No funeral is planned yet, but at the wake, it would be nice if some woman showed up in a fur and a little dog on a diamond leash and then threw champagne in another woman's face and called her a whore for sleeping with her lover and then they wrestled in a fountain. It's the way Anna Nicole would have wanted it. (www.wwtdd.com)

My man Hugh Hefner's statement: "She was a dear friend who meant a great deal to the Playboy family, and to me personally"

www.Gawker.com has a surprisingly nice comment about Anna: Not since Cleopatra first cast her spell upon both Julius Caesar and Marc Antony has the world seen a seductress the likes of Anna Nicole Smith. Gifted with the rare combination of beauty, drive, and rapier-like wit, Smith proved that a woman could outgrow her hardscrabble upbringing with a firm sense of herself and the refusal to accept any sort of failure. In every single way, she was the purest embodiment of the modern female celebrity.

Too Soon Anna

2007-02-08T16:12:00.000-05:00

So Anna Nicole Smith died today and I'm very upset. I really liked Anna Nicole because she was crazy and loved Marilyn Monroe. I used to watch her reality show and was sad that she didn't continue with it. What is really sad is that she has this little baby who will never know her mother, and there is such secrecy around Anna Nicole's real life, maybe she will never really know her mother. The whole paternity suit will hopefully settle soon, I doubt that her lawyer Howard K. Stern is really the father of the baby, its most likely Larry Birkhead, a photographer that has been fighting for Anna to bring the daughter to the US. Another fight will be over the estate of her late husband Howard Marshall. Even though Anna died, I'm sure people will fight for the money to go to the baby. I need a drink. Which is what Anna would have wanted for me.

Blogger hates me

2007-02-02T14:21:00.000-05:00

I'm posting for the sake of posting since for the past few times I've tried to logon Blogger hasn't been working. At least I know its not just me because Trent from Pink is the New Blog was also having problems... so sad that I know that. I found a new blog btw, What Would Tyler Durden Do? http://www.wwtdd.com , I think I will be asking myself more often what would Tyler Durden do? I used to ask What Would Uncle Jessie Do? www.wwujd.com, but maybe I need a new outlook on life.

Any boys want to do me a favor and pick up the new issue of Playboy for me? The "Playboy Interview" is Jeremy Piven this month and I want to read it! But I'm a baby and don't want to pick up Playboy myself, Dan D. was kind enough to pick one up for me when Marilyn Monroe was on the cover last year.

One Hour into the Globes...

2007-01-15T21:09:00.000-05:00

So its about an hour into the Golden Globes and things are going well, I'm happy for Jennifer Hudson and Eddie Murphy for their wins. I love Meryl Streep and Hugh Laurie's acceptance speeches, I like when people are kinda real and off the cuff with their speeches. I like Sienna Miller's dress, but I could do without her hair. I also think that Sarah Jessica Parker, Drew Barrymore, Angelina Jolie, Reese Witherspoon look lovely. I think its funny how last year people like Reese Witherspoon and Joaquin Phoenix were all the rage, and now this year nobody cares as much about them. They're still big stars and very talented, but its weird how public favor can change so quickly if you're out of the spotlight for awhile. Now this year everyone is talking about Jennifer Hudson, but next year will she be as big of a deal as everyone is making right now? I almost feel bad for the people who are "so last year," but as Andy Warhol said, "everyone gets their 15 minutes."

A Moaning Good Time at the Cineplex

2007-01-11T22:27:00.000-05:00

So tonight Dan D. and I go to the movies to see The Holiday. Which I enjoyed, very cute, it was aiming to be like Love Actually, but Love Actually was better. But I still enjoyed it, (it was Dan's third time going to see it). Anyway... toward the last 20 or 15 minutes of the movie I hear something coming from another member of the audience. It wasn't a laugh... or a sigh... but maybe a grumble? I didn't think much about it and put my full concentration on Jude Law. Then, we hear a loud MOAN come from the middle of the theater. There was no way to mistake it, it was a mooooaaaan. And about 30 seconds later we hear it again! Which led Dan and I to believe that this guy was getting head in the theater. And it wasn't like this was an empty theater either, it was pretty full! Being the mature people that we are, Dan and I laughed uncontrolably. We tried to hide it because it wasn't a funny part of the movie and we didn't want to disrupt those around us, but in retrospect... I think an audible moan in a movie theater is more disruptive than laughter! But we were forced to do the "silent laugh" in the theater which consisted of me quietly shaking in my seat and covering my face while Dan had to bite on his cheek to keep from laughing. It was so difficult to keep quiet, and I was crying from laughing so hard. So after the movie/sex session, We deduced that this man's girlfriend... or boyfriend... pleaded with him to take her to see "The Holiday" and her final offer was, "If you take me, I'll give you head in the movie theater." So Mystery Moaning Man from the 7:05 showing of "The Holiday" at the Ritz 16 Theater, all I want to know is... were you thinking of Cameron Diaz... or Jude Law?

Download...

2007-01-02T22:02:00.000-05:00

Gwen Stefani - Sweet Escape

The Who - Man in a Purple Dress

John Legend - Where Did My Baby Go?

Muse - Starlight

Taylor Hicks - Runaround

Fergie - Clumsy

Cream - I'm So Glad

Damien Rice - 9 Crimes

The Decemberists - The Perfect Crime #2

Gorillaz - Dirty Harry

Osunlade - Circles

Quantic - Tell It Like You Mean It

Regina Spektor - Us

Joanna Newsom - Monkey and Bear

Happy New Years!

2007-01-02T21:53:00.000-05:00

Whew! What a weekend! I had so much fun visiting my Manhattan College family and seeing most of my favorites, especially the ones I hadn't seen since the summer (cough Sammy). Saturday night was a nice night just to catch up and of course drink a bit... I was surprised to see a couple changes on Waldo and 238th that I didn't know about. Congrats to the NEW River Deli and the crazy upgrade they did recently. I bet Ahad loves his new pad. And thankfully Fenwicks put the bar back on the other side, but unthankfully, they took out the tables. What are people supposed to smash when Sean Paul's "Tempature" comes on?

Boo! For some reason I can't upload the pictures I stole from Facebook! Well, anyone who reads this can get on facebook anyway, so look at them there.

Shout out to Johnny Bananas, the coolest cat in Riverdale, hopefully he doesn't still smell like beer. Some devil spilled beer on Johnny during the party. You know how cats lick themselves to get clean? I wonder if Johnny got drunk when he tried to clean himself the next day...?

WHO Loves You Baby?

2006-11-28T17:16:00.000-05:00

So Saturday night I had one of the greatest concert experiences of my life... THE WHO.

We had great seats, right in the middle, right in front of the stage. Well, not right in front of the stage, I wasn't on the floor, but I was the next section up and it was still a great view. I can't wait to get the dvd of my concert! They did alot of old stuff of course and some new songs from Endless Wire. One of my favorite parts of the concert is when they did Man in a Purple Dress from Endless Wire. It was so simple, it was great. During the concert I couldn't stop smiling, I was so happy. It was great to actually see Roger Daltrey and Pete Townsend do all their signature moves live on stage. They're coming back in March to AC and I def want to go again! I almost died when they did a medley of Tommy songs for their encore! You can tell so manyy people were waiting for the Tommy songs because it reeked of pot once they started haha. Ooooh It was money well spent!!! (well not the pot, the tickets, I'm sure the money everyone spent on drugs that night was well spent as well...)

Gawking and Stalking

2006-11-17T11:13:00.000-05:00

so I never really went on this website before, but the people from www.gawker.com have this section of their website that is called the "Gawker Stalker" and its for NYC celebrity sightings. George Clooney actually had his "people" write into the site with fake sightings so people wouldn't use the site. I guess its supposed to be like, "If you want to see Sarah Jessica Parker, go to blah blah blah..." But I dont know who would really do that (yes, even I wouldn't do that) besides the paparazzi. My favorite part is how people always comment on their skin and height. Like, "saw Brooke Sheilds at a toy store, very tall, nice skin, smiled alot." I think its funny those are the only qualities people care to mention. They don't even comment on what they're wearing that much. Oh and how skinny they are too.

Maybe I'll put in stuff about me and make myself into a celebrity, "Saw Siobhan O'Brien walking on 5th avenue, short, very pale and was talking on her cell phone." "Caught a glimpse of Siobhan O'Brien at Fenwicks, very drunk, very annoying..."

Bored at the Office.

2006-11-16T17:57:00.000-05:00

Just got back from another boring day at work. They have been telling me for over two weeks that I will be getting my email and access to the database soon, but still nothing has happened. I need access to the database to do something called "acceptance" work for files that are booked, well the files are just growing and growing and if I ever get access again I am going to be totally overwhelmed. So I guess I should relish my boring days, but it makes me feel so useless. I can only go on Perez Hilton or Cnn.com so many times. Sadly I don't get access to Myspace, Facebook, or Hotmail, so the days go by slowly and I feel very disconnected from my fellow working friends.

I felt really disconnected today because nobody was returning my calls either. I was curious if something was wrong with my phone and I wasn't receiving calls, I think that is what sad, sorry, friendless people think when their calls aren't returned. I'm hoping that Jessica is alive because she was sick all day yesterday and she didn't respond to my calls and texts. One of my texts was even about Kristin Chenoweth's new musical, but still no response. That got me very worried. Eh, she'll show up eventually.

Quick Pic: Maria and I at Lisa's for Halloween. My mom and I made my costume! I actually sewed! I'm like a 50s housewife!!

Oh man..

2006-10-06T22:03:00.000-05:00

Its eleven o'clock on a friday night and I'm watching a movie with my parents. My choice? Memoirs of a Geisha. Their choice? which we are currently watching, RV. Yes the movie with Robin Williams where he gets an RV and drives his family across the country. Omg I think I'm going to throw up, Robin Williams was just sprayed by fecal matter. *Wrech* Well they seem to be enjoying it. Being so obsessed with their trailer and all. I wish I was drinking.

Download...

2006-09-27T23:11:00.000-05:00

The Devics- Lie to Me

Asobi Seksu - Thursday

Devotchka - You Love Me

Fergie - Mary Jane Shoes

Justin Timberlake - Love Stoned

Nico - These Days

Ben Gibbard - Thriller

Beyonce - Get Me Bodied

Music Music Everywhere and Not a Second to Listen

2006-09-23T17:43:00.000-05:00

I've been on music overload the past few weeks. Ironically it was after My computer crashed and I lost all my music. The past couple weeks I've been really into the new Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, Fergie, Little Miss Sunshine Soundtrack, and Christina Aguilera. But I just stole oodles of music from Tara and Bridget and now have countless more music to listen to. I also just got the new Pete Yorn, but haven't given it a good listen yet. Right now I'm listening to the Pussycat Dolls, yeah I have the pussycat dolls cd... Wanna make something of it? Today Tara informed me that the new Killers and Common album are on their way as well.

Speaking of the Killers, I will be seeing them next week! Jessica's dad got us tickets to the season premiere of SNL! I don't know if I could ask for a better show, Dane Cook is the host and The Killers as a musical guest? Fantastical.

Red Badge of Facebook

2006-09-08T22:07:00.000-05:00

I appreciate that Mike, who i guess is the "Tom" of Facebook, took the time to write a long apology letter to all the Facebook kids. Thank you Mike, apology accepted.

Hey There Facebook Kids!

2006-08-27T14:32:00.000-05:00

Facebook is slowly taking over the world, and making stalking easier and easier... Now my facebook fans can see my updated blog by looking at my facebook profile. I guess this will help me update my blog more often. As of late, my computer crashed, dan devece went back to school today, I re-discovered my love of Teen Girl Squad, and I'm awaiting the arrival of a brand new laptop. Sadly I am starting to realize all of the music I have now lost due to the lack of me backing up. Luckily I backed up the music I actually paid for on iTunes, but everything I burned from my years at school is now gone :-( So if anyone wants to send me cds they are more than welcomed too! Once my new computer is up and running I will be able to do more creative blogging, a summer post will be in the works, with all the highlights of the first 3 months of being a college grad. ugh...

Working Girl

2006-08-15T11:32:00.000-05:00

Ok, so Its been awhile since I've update this thing. Honestly, the first two months I was home I wasn't that busy. I was trying to look for a job and in the meantime I was cast in a play at Burlinton County Footlighters. To my surprise and delight they casted me as the lead! It was Thorton Wilder's The Matchmaker, which is the play that Hello, Dolly! with Barbara Streisand was based on. And I was Dolly Gallagher Levi. I had so much fun doing it and it was great to see some of my fellow Footlighters Interns, and meet some new ones at the same time. I consider the show's run a success and I think it was one of my favorite shows I've been apart of.

Right now I'm at work, I've been at CitiCapital for almost a month, nothing long-term, just a temp job to earn some money so I don't blow through my savings. But at the moment I have nothing to do, and maybe I'll start blogging again to pass the time while I'm at work. I need to post pictures from this summer as well, hopefully they will be on here soon.

Have a great rest-of-the-summer!

Its been a long time...

2006-06-17T10:46:00.000-05:00

So I'm graduated and tomorrow I will have been home for exactly one month. No job. No prospects. Not caring. That is my life right now. So enough of that, lets move on to Taylor Hicks.

I bought his single last tuesday which was very exciting and even more exciting is that he was named the hottest bachelor by People magazine!

SENIOR WEEK IS DONE

2006-05-20T23:15:00.000-05:00

I'm graduating in 13 hours....

fuck.

Let Pitt Be

2006-05-07T22:37:00.000-05:00

I have Big Love for Margene

2006-05-04T15:53:00.000-05:00

I'm really into the new show on HBO, "Big Love." Those wacky poligamists! Always marrying more than one person! My favorite character is Margene who is played by Ginnifer Goodwin (Walk the Line and Mona Lisa Smile). I identify with Margene, nobody appreciates her and she is cute and friendly. She also has a blog on the HBO website:
http://boards.hbo.com/forum.jspa?forumID=700000143

Best of... Phone Photos

2006-05-02T22:45:00.000-05:00

Here are a few of my fav pics taken with the mobile...
One of the few pretty spots at Da Mount (much love...)
Dad cleaning up the yard on a Spring Day

Eugene O'Neill Theater, current home to Sweeney Todd Willa T. Ford, the one and only
Philly City Hall from over Easter Break

Last Weekend

2006-04-30T12:44:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday Shamar

2006-04-22T00:57:00.000-05:00

Jake's Dilemma Woman's Bathroom Last Night

Stranger: Hello?
Siobhan*in the stall*: Hello.
Stranger: Whatcha doin'?
Siobhan: What do you think?
Stranger: Wanna have sex?
Siobhan: No thank you...
Stranger: Ok, bye!

P.S. the stranger was a black man

Only in Jakes' folks

I'm BACK!!!

2006-04-14T09:59:00.000-05:00

So finally I'm back to blogging. I totally forgot my username and password for this thing, it used to be saved to my computer but something happened and I actually had to sign in for once. Eh, but anyways...

Right now I'm home in South Jersey. I kidnapped Sammy and we had so much fun last night. We went to the Courthouse Tavern (formally Buzz's) to see Ginger be Ryan Seacrest and host their open-mic night. It was sooo much fun! This guy Ginger referred to as "Papa Bear" came in and brought all of these instruments with him so people could play along to the beat. It felt like Kindergarden music class and it was awesome. Sammy and I did get a talking to when we weren't paying attention and just shaking our instruments while talking haha. Everyone that played was pretty good too, I thought it was going to be like drunken kareoke at Fenwicks, but I was happily surprised.

NEWS FLASH: Courthouse Tavern is changing its name back to Buzz's!

Can't stop shopping...

2006-03-18T15:09:00.000-05:00

So I didn't go anywhere fun for Spring Break because I had no money. Which in turn, meant that I was to go to New Jersey and save. Well things dont always turn out the way you expect them to. When I came home I had less than fifty dollars on my credit card, after a week in New Jersey with nothing to do I have 251.56 now on my card. Thats after I made a payment this week. What did you buy Siobhan? (you may ask) Well I bought whatever I fancied, thats what I bought. Clothes, a new phone, new dvd, makeup, AND a Dooney and Bourke purse.
Do you want to hear my justification for that? Well here goes, I wanted to buy myself a graduation present because I know I'll be getting money in a couple months for my successful college career. So I decided to buy a nice wallet, well when I found out how much wallets cost I might as well get a purse if I'm going to spend that money. I also don't own any nice purses. I called Jessica at work since I considered this (as Mr. Mett would say) a "judgement call." Calling Jessica to help me decide is like me asking the salesperson if she thought I should buy a purse, she would just tell me to get it. I was looking at some of the smaller purses and they were only 10-25 dollars cheaper than the barrel purse, so I might as well spend the extra money and get the bigger one. Being the good girl that I am, I called my mom. She said it was ok as long as I took my credit card out of my wallet, but I told her I couldn't promise her that (after all, I am my mother's daughter). So I decided to just suck it up and get it, my mom made a donation anyway and we all lived happily ever after (or happily ignorant until my credit card bill comes).

Perez, I love you!

2006-03-13T19:50:00.000-05:00

I love the captions that Perez Hilton puts on the pictures from his website. I think because its so ghetto makes it even funnier. And its hilarious when its about TomKat:

God I Love You Perez

I'm so creative!

2006-03-13T19:43:00.000-05:00

Alright, so the other night Dan D. and I were drinking at my house and decided to put "Walk the Line" on because Dan hasn't seen it yet. WELL, it was then that I came up with the Walk the Line drinking game! Here are the rules:

Drink whenever any form of Johnny or June's name is mentioned
Drink whenever Johnny is wearing any black
Drink when someone has a guitar
Drink when someone sings
Drink when Johnny is fucked up
(For extra fun) Speak in a southern accent and drink whenever you speak in your normal voice
Chug a beer when Junes says "You don't walk no line"

So we didn't get through the entire movie, but you drink alot for just having 7 rules. Jessica and I are planning on playing later this week so we'll see if more rules need to be added.

GOING CRAZY ON SPRING BREAK '06!!!!!!!!!

Its Hard Out Here For a Pimp

2006-03-06T18:43:00.000-05:00

So the Academy Awards have come and gone. It was the first time in my life that I wasn't there for the beginning of the show, and of course the first time I miss the beginning is when George wins (more on that later), but thank goodness for DVR and I got to watch it later after the show was finished. I was pretty pleased on the outcome, I hear Crash is amazing and honestly the whole Brokeback Craze was starting to get on my nerves a bit, if the movie wasn't so hyped up it may have won.

I would have loved for Joaquin to win, but if he had to lose to someone I'm glad it was PHILLIP SEYMOR HOFFMAN!!! For awhile I was thinking that Felicity Huffman was going to get best actress over Reese, but I'm glad she won, she had one of the best speeches of the night and looked so pretty.

Ahh darn, my George Clooney pic isn't working, that means he'll get his own post later today.

I'm just travelin' travelin' travelin'....

2006-03-01T13:46:00.000-05:00

Me and my roomies with my dream drink... one huge margarita! If only I had it to myself! yummm

iTunes is offering the Dolly Parton song Travelin' Thru on their site for free! Go download it! It's nominated for an Academy Award and I heart it! And I heart Dolly Parton and all the crazy plastic surgery she gets!

hell yes

2006-02-24T19:37:00.000-05:00

Saw this on http://www.perezhilton.com today and I think its too good not to share:

Thanks Perez!!

My Favorite!

2006-02-24T15:26:00.000-05:00

Here's a link to a new David Sedaris story in the New Yorker for anyone who reads him... which should be everyone because he's hilarious.

http://www.newyorker.com/shouts/content/articles/060227sh_shouts

Click On This NOWWWW

2006-02-21T21:59:00.000-05:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6PTFRmmuvc&search=saved%20by%20the%20bell

you won't regret it.

My life has been taken over by reading for my various classes, mainly Modern America and Holocaust and Genocide. I have to take a break from reading about war and people dying before I sink into a deep deep depression.

You Don't Forget Your First Love

2006-02-19T23:43:00.000-05:00

If lovin' you is wrong, I don't want to be right...
Good Luck March 5th

Random Jack Bauer Facts

2006-02-14T00:21:00.000-05:00

This is almost as good as the Chuck Norris ones...

Only two people dared to argue with Jack Bauer. David Palmer and Michelle Dessler. Tony apologized.

If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".

When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.

If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.

Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.

If Jack Bauer was gay, his name would be Chuck Norris

Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling yoo hoo!

2006-02-12T17:16:00.000-05:00

So it snowed like 2 feet since yesterday, I love a good ol' blizzard, but I love them even more when they start on a sunday! I'm not risking not doing work in case we do have class tomorrow, very unlike me i know!
Lisa and Richie on the way back from the train last night. Jakes Dilemma was certainly interesting. I started drinking Long Islands and Katy made me stop because she thought that I was going to be too shitty, but I really didn't get drunk at all last night... damn you bevan.

UPDATE: NO SCHOOL TOMORROW!!!!!

While on one of my gossip sites I stumbled across a new t-shirt website that is def worth checking out. The Chuck Norris tees are already starting to be churned out...
http://www.noisebot.com/t-shirts_hoodies_tote_bags

100 Nights

2006-02-11T18:24:00.000-05:00

Here is a little taste of our Gaelic Park Seinor Night last night. Good job to the kids at Manhattan College for drinking so much that the bar had to close 45 minutes early. Lots of randomness insued afterwards as always, I don't remember going to bed, but Lisa informed me that she guided me there and tucked me in. Hopefully Lisa didn't take advantage of me in my drunken state...

It took almost four years of college to earn this...

2006-02-11T18:22:00.001-05:00

You Passed 8th Grade Science

Congratulations, you got 8/8 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Science?

Manhattan College Survey!

2006-01-28T14:38:00.000-05:00

When you first attended MC, where did you live? Jasper 4th Floor
Who was/were your roommate(s)? Michelle Tricarico
Do you still talk to them? I talked to her last night actually
Ever get in trouble in the dorms? oodles, but was never written up!
Something you remember when you lived on campus? jasper elevators suck
Your campus phone number or other number: 8211
First party attended? Dan & Erics room on the J-5 Wing
First Bar you got wasted at? Free Wine (even though its not really a bar)
Favorite Pizza Place in Riverdale? B'way Joes
Favorite Diner? SHORT STOP
Did you go to the library? I go as often as Zach Morris did on Saved By The Bell
Where did you buy your books?
Who made the best wings?
Favorite bar?
Ever attend a school sporting event?
Ever attend a concert or comedic performance?at MC?
Did you move off campus, when and where?
Have you ever spent the night on campus not in a dorm hall?
Favorite night to go out on, and where did you go?
Happy hour, where did you go?
Favorite Year of Halloween?
Did you ever have a job around campus?
What do you hate about Riverdale?
What did you love most about it?
Ever leave Riverdale to go on a road trip, where?
Where would you believe is the best location to live in Riverdale?
Graduated or still attending?
Year of graduation?2006
Will you go back?
How many parking tickets have you gotten?
Finally, ever gotten arrested?

Vanilla Bicardi + Diet Vanilla Coke = Good

2006-01-22T18:39:00.000-05:00

Today I moved into Manhattan College for the very last time. This is so bittersweet.

An exciting development for today is that I put up our quote wall for 3K, already we hae 4 quotes on it (disclaimer: some of these you might have had to be there to enjoy):

"Well, Do you want to go to the beach... or New Jersey?" - Maria, on spring break

"That really sucks lady!!!!" - Titanic deleted scene (we didn't say it, but it was too hilarious not to put up)

"It was the best two years of my life, well, not really." - Jenn about not getting her period while she had cancer

"Can I touch your gobble-neck?" - Jenn on the horrible Titanic deleted scene

Music makes the world go round

2006-01-19T23:18:00.000-05:00

So I've been finding some really good music lately. My new favorites that I'm listening to are Fall Out Boy and The Decemberists. Their respective albums are really good and I especially enjoy having cds that I want to listen to all the way through. I really haven't felt that way about a new band since The Killers and the Postal Service. Actually I really enjoyed the Black Eyed Peas cd that came out this summer, that was good too.

The Decemberists kinda remind me of The Shins, which was another good cd from last year haha. I guess its good to move away from classic rock once in awhile. Because of my summer discovering The Who and taking those Kruth classes, I stopped paying too much attention to new music (as The Beatles comes on my playlist). I like listening to a bunch of new music all at once at the moment.

Something else I've had on my iTunes forver is the new White Stripes cd. I know its supposed to not be one of their better ones, but I definitely take notice when one of their songs come on. I think if I really started to listen to the whole album I would find that I like it alot.

Most unexpected part of my day: watching the babysitter's club movie with beth! Alex Mack, Rachel Leigh Cook, and the girl from Orange County were all in it!!! Star studded!!!

2006-01-16T23:59:00.000-05:00

Two men I love. Joaquin won a Golden Globe tonight like another man I love, George Clooney. It was a good night for all my men lol. PHILLIP SEYMOR HOFFMAN! won tonight, I imagined 3K screaming his name together when he won. Then Hugh Laurie(ah!) reminded me of Lisa screaming in terror every time Katy's boyfriend appears on screen. Hooray for being back at school soon! Boo for last semester at MC....

I made TWO great purchases this weekend. FIRST blank cds that look like vinyl records! They feel like vinyl too! I was so amazed, just saying.
SECOND I found Marilyn Monroe inscence at Hot Topic. Inscense reminds me of being in 6th grade and my sophmore year roommate Miss Jenni Moran.

Shuh-Barbie

2006-01-08T18:18:00.000-05:00

It really upsets me that a picture of me doesn't come up when I Google Image myself. I wonder how one remedies that?
....
Omg, so I just typed in 'Siobhan' to see what came up and I found that someone modeled a doll after me! This is so exciting! You know whats more exciting? The fact that I'm going to sue those bastards for using my likeness without permission. The picture is uncanny I know.

Who Really Wants Kevin Federline as their Friend?

2006-01-03T17:57:00.000-05:00

I was amused by the fact that when I went to add Kevin Federline as a friend to myspace it asked me "Do you really want to add Kevin Federline as a friend?" Now, I know that they always ask that question before you add a friend, but I feel like MySpace was asking me in a different tone. Like, "Are you sure you really want people to think you associate with Kevin Federline? Really? Kevin Federline? *sigh* alright, if you say so....."

My new Facebook picture. I have another picture similar to this, but I think its a little too much for facebook. Maybe its more of a MySpace picture:

2006... bitches

2006-01-02T12:39:00.000-05:00

I find that I have been adding the word "bitches" to everything I've been doing lately. My away message will say something like "Taking a shower... bitches." Maybe I've been watching "Lazy Sunday" by Chris Parnell and Andy Samberg too much. Holy crap it just came on my playlist, thats creepy. If Jess gets to bring me to a SNL rehearsal we decided that we're going to bring a bakers dozen of cupcakes and make friends with Andy (who is my man no matter what jessica says). The video is free on iTunes for anyone who is interested.

This year I actually had a fun New Years. Its still one of my least favorite holidays but this year I had fun running around to different Stockton parties. I love how I've been to Stockton so many times that I'm a little extension of Jessica's group of friends. On the map of their friends I would be a territory owned by Jessica's country. In my territory everyone is pale and blonde, but not in the scary aryan race sort of way. No scratch that, I'm the only girl and I'm surrounded by men who resemble George Clooney or Joaquin Phoenix.

Retraction: I apologize to Samuel Willis for making fun of his creepy christmas decoration in a previous post.

Go To The Mirror

2005-12-30T23:05:00.000-05:00

Kelly Jones' version of "Substitute" is one of my new favorite songs. I was trying to Limewire his music to get other songs of his, but nothing really came up except for other people with Kelly or Jones in their name.

I finally got to watch my Tommy/Quadrophenia live DVD and of course got things started by watching a 1989 live version of Tommy first. First, Roger Daltrey has a mullet. Second, he is wearing jean on jean. Third, Phil Collins makes a surprisingly great Uncle Ernie. Fourth, Billy Idol makes a surprisingly horrible Cousin Kevin. You let me down William. Omg it was also during Elton John's depressed years because his hair is white and he looks older than he does now. I need to make a dent in my Christmas presents before I go back to school.

I find it interesting that Friday is one of my first nights in this week. Not OUT... IN. I guess I need to rest up for tomorrow!

Waaaay too much time on my hands....

2005-12-24T12:39:00.000-05:00

and there is more where that came from. I need a new hobby.

2005-12-22T22:45:00.000-05:00

Every once in awhile you need a Facebook /Myspace /Blog photoshoot. Here are some choice shots, maybe I should have a vote on the favorite one. The winning one will have the prestigious position as being my main photo that appears by my name when others are stalking me. Stalkers need to have a good photo to look at.
By the way, everyone should download Ben Lee - Running with Scissors. It randomly came on my playlist and i enjoyed it. I saw him open for Ben Folds and Rufus Wainwright and he was so the Australia version of Jason Mraz so I was destined to become a fan.

The Christmas Rat

2005-12-21T19:38:00.000-05:00

Can we talk about the most horrifying Christmas decoration of all time? To the left is a picture of a present that Sam's brother put in his stocking one year at Christmas. As you can see its a VERY lifelike rat that is feeding its many babies. If you would also take note of the one baby rat humping the mother's back leg. I was totally freaked out by it, I gasped and covered my mouth when I saw it. So Sam loves this thing, but he only puts it out at Christmastime, which makes it the most horrifying Christmas decoration.... EVER.

I really dont think the picture does enough justice to the life-likeness it really contains.

2005-12-19T22:55:00.000-05:00

So I was back at work today. It was fun to catch up and the day went by pretty fast actually. Only one person was rude to me on the phone, yes! Its just going to suck waking up early every day blaaaaah. At least Nick and I will be e-mailing like the young professionals that we are!

Right now I'm listening to Janis. If you haven't ever really listened to her stuff, you should download/itunes/buy her song Ball and Chain. Its a live recording, actually i dont think there is a studio version, but anyway, its a live recording of her singing this great lady blues song. Shes screaming in pain as she puts down these lyrics about how love is a ball and chain. The unique thing about her singing is that she has this great throaty voice and is able to sing a song as if she is making it up on the spot. Which makes it really hard for anyone to do her songs, because after hearing it the way Janis sings it, its hard to make the song sound original.

And a small salute to Dan DeVece with the best away message ever:
Auto response from wonderfulmfer: to you the underage college student...to those who will leave a bar just to buy you your goods...to those who will go out with a broken foot...to those who will ditch their friends from high school to be with the one they "heart"...to meeting his roommate after their long ass drive...we salute you siobhan and jess for all you have done...:-D
LOVES IT

Gay Bar Crawl

2005-12-18T12:40:00.000-05:00

Our lovely top model James is demonstrating the Corona that we foolishly drank out of in a random resturaunt which we went into only to use the bathroom.

Nick is now drinking from the random Corona bottle that thankfully had no roofies in it. As James predicted it was quite the random night. Danielle, Nicole, James, Shamar, Nick and I all dressed in black, I'm not sure why, but Nick told us to so we complied. We were quite the popular group too, we made friends of all ages and nationalities. A charming older gay fellow cracked my back outside the bar, proceeded to hit on James (when he kissed James hand, James' comment "oh nice ring, is that with your partner?... thats nice..."). We met a Russian and an Australian from Disney on Ice! Everyone was happy to bring Danielle to her first gay bar, I'm sure she was impressed with the experience. I would love to go back to that bar, but I feel like it will never be as fun as that first time. It was such a random coming together of so many different people, it was such a crazy night, and a good way to send off the first semester of senior year.

Thats a picture I just took of my Bailey boo. We were finally reunited! He's soooo cute!!! We put up our Christmas tree today so I'm sure there are going to be a bunch of pictures of him sleeping underneath the tree. He is totally going to win on http://www.kittenwar.com !

Top Model All The Time

2005-12-15T20:54:00.000-05:00

Last night James, Melissa, Nick, and myself participated in a Manhattan's Next Top Model Showdown with Jamie as our prop.

This is one of my favorite pictures from the night. A random-ass night is what it was too. We end up in Fenwicks then Sammy, Melissa, and I were on a mission and ended up in one of the guy's rooms on our floor of OV.

Now VH1 has been playing a marathon of Top Model all day, which is always awesome.

Sio on the Rocks

2005-12-14T21:09:00.000-05:00

I should be studying.... well, not studying, working on my paper about a blind sax player who could play 3 saxophone's at one time. But I'm drinking instead. Once again, under the influence of Sammy. But when I go home I'll have a Mt. Laurel counterpart. Jessica. In that picture (with her roomie Alexis) thats not hot cocoa in our mugs!

High and Dry

2005-12-13T23:17:00.000-05:00

The blonde gentelman that is second from left should give you a hint as to how I'm feeling. he he. I'm sure going to miss my special buddy Sammy during break. Thank goodness there is a Mt. Laurel conterpart, Danny.

My List You Ask?

Strawberry Fields Forever
Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds
Tomorrow Never Knows
She's a Rainbow
The Weight
Rainy Day Woman 12 & 35
Subterreanean Homesick Blues
The Blowers Daughter
In The End
The First Taste
White Rabbit
All These Things I've Done
The Seeker
Baba O'Reilly
Magic Bus

AWARD SEASON BEGINS!

2005-12-13T18:38:00.000-05:00

Yay for Reese and Mr. Phoenix being nominated for Golden Globes!!! This is one of the best movies I've seen in awhile, of course Brokeback and Rent were great, but you can't beat a biopic! Aaaand I'm so excited for George Clooney and his THREE nominations! Ahhh hes so talented!

Siobhan is the new Blog

2005-12-13T17:42:00.000-05:00

Oooh No....

Siobhan has a new blog. Right now my template is the black one because its the one PostSecret uses. :-)

Danielle, Jenn, Me, Sammy, Lisa, and Nick at the Jasper Jingle from last friday. It was fun to dress up and look pretty (which I normally look like) but it kinda sucked how they were literally "cutting" people off from drinking. See those attractive neon green bracelets we had to wear? Well, if the club thought we were too intoxicated (which was impossible because they put a tablespoon of alcohol in our drinks) they would cut the bracelet off and refuse to serve us. Now, I was a lady the whole night, but some of my other friends weren't so lucky.

Highlights of the night?
Sean catching Lisa in the air while dancing to "Time of My Life" from Dirty Dancing
Poor Katy getting cut off, but everyone getting her drinks anyway
My outfit:

Roland bearing a resemblance to Russel Crowe from A Beautiful Mind

Ok. now its time to eat dinner. I'll catch you kids lata!